Achilles' Ankle

My very own Achilles' ankle was born on September 30th, 2010. Tiny arms and legs wrapped snugly in a receiving blanket and placed in my arms, and little eyes staring up at me with strange recognition changed me forever. We looked at each other for the first time; the unspoken love between us was strong. What did I do to deserve this gift? The special place I held in my heart for Gabriel during my pregnancy grew as we watched each other. At the same time I felt something else appear that had never been there before. A weak spot. Small, but powerful. My heart was softened by this tiny spot, and I will never be the same.

The day my son was born was the day GOD gave me something beyond meaningful in my life. Gabriel is an extension of me. My heart is full to the brim with love for him. Every protective instinct I posses is on alert. If only I could keep him from heartbreak, if only I could shield him from any pain or physical harm. Whenever he is in pain, I am in agony. My weak spot is powered by the level of importance he holds in my life, and the knowledge that I have such limited control over his life. If I were to ever loose him, I feel like I would loose myself.

And so I walk around, constantly feeling my Achilles' ankle present with me. I feel so vulnerable now. All I can do is love my son the best that I can, trust GOD to take care of him (because HE loves Gabriel more than I ever could), and be thankful for heart that is softer. I am so thankful that GOD has given me this gift.

I can only be in awe of Abraham who loved GOD so much that he was willing to sacrifice his son for HIM. And even deeper than that is my FATHER who sent HIS own SON to born a humble birth and to be a sacrifice for me. What beautiful love...