Sunday, July 24, 2011

Ocean




Saturday we went to the beach. It was so amazing to spend a beautiful day with my family in Lincoln City. On the way there we stopped at the Spirit Mountain casino and ate at the buffet that they had there. It was my first time there, but I had been hearing Nestor raving about it for the past three years. So finally we went and I have to say that it was the best buffet I have ever been to. It was actually really good food and there was a huge selection. Gabriel loved it so much. He sat next to me in his high chair all excited and clearly enjoying all the different foods. I could tell by all the 'yummy' noises and faces he made. Man, I love that kid.

Once we were at the beach it was a pretty big task to haul the small cooler, blankets, bag, and Gabriel all down to the shore with just the two of us. It took a while, but finally we found a spot relatively free of people. The good weather had the beach stocked with visitors. Gabriel enjoyed being outside and seeing the waves. He smiled the whole time and squealed a lot. He didn't want to get wet, but he laughed as we chased and ran away from the waves. I tried to get him to play in the sand with me, but when I set him down in it he started crying. Haha, I guess he didn't care for the feel of it. So he smiled the whole time as he crawled around on our blankets. At one point he crawled around the entire edge of the blankets careful not to touch the sand, but his little foot slipped off and onto the sand. He looked back at that foot with such a funny expression and then quickly reclaimed it from the sand. It was pretty funny. Mostly he spent his time digging his little fingers into the bag of chips we had out. He fed me some and drank some apple juice. We laughed and tickled and took pictures making silly faces. It was an amazing time.

The ocean was beautiful. The weather was incredible. Warm, sunny, and blue sky. No clouds. And as I laid out on the blanket with Nestor next to me and Gabriel crawling everywhere making joyful noises, I stared up at that big blue sky. I couldn't remember the last time I stared up into a sunny sky, and I wasn't sure if I had ever taken the time to stare into a cloudless sky. It was so breathtaking, so easy to get lost in the vast blue. Suddenly I realized I was so happy. So content. Life felt effortless and blissful. I love my life. I am so in love with Nestor, and my sweet baby boy. Life is so grand. I am so happy. God has blessed me so beyond what I could have ever asked for. He is a great God, and I thank Him for this time of blessings.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Heart Change

When I was 17 I read Isaiah 43:1-2.

" But now, this is what the LORD says— he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel:"Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. 2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze."


Verse one grabbed hold of me and I realized that Christ had a claim on me. I was His. He wanted me as His own despite all my failures. And it didn't stop there. He loved me enough to redeem me. I immediately decided this passage was going to be my life verse. It will always be dear to my heart and always encourage me, but my life has greatly changed since then. I feel like I am a completely different person now.

So as my life has changed I feel my life verse must also change. God has been taking me through a heart change this past year. It has been a very hard and very beautiful experience. I feel I have gotten past the hardest part and am now coming into a time of rest and communion. I feel excited and ready to pursue God as my first love with all that is in me. I am scared because I know He has called me to ministry. I know that the more I am obedient to Him, the more He will stretch me pull me out of my comfort zone and call me into action. This terrifies me. But the Lord be my help.

I have begun to travel down a road. This road is one that I am determined to press forward on. I will not stop no matter how difficult it gets because the farther down this road I travel, the closer I get to my Jesus. And that's all I want.

It is easy for me to look in the past and still feel the pain. But the past is gone and only a tool that the devil uses to distract me from goal. This being said I'm sure you can guess what my new life verse is. Philippians 3:12-14.

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Amazing verse, huh!? This is my heart, and I feel so passionate about this. I want everyone I know to experience the pull of Jesus and the desire to pursue Him. I'm ready for this. God has been preparing me my whole life for His calling. The starting gun has been shot. I'm in race. I'm off an running and I'm not turning back. Jesus, be my strength and courage.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Beloved

My newest worship song. Inspired by a wedding. Hope you like (:

"Beloved"
(V1)
I come to you, Beloved
With a heart as full as the ocean
overflowing with love for You Beloved
A passion meant only for You
Let me stay with you forever
Let me rest my head at Your feet
I've been searching all my life for you Beloved
And I'm sorry it took so long to find You

(Chorus)
I don't wanna waste one more moment away from You
I can't spend one more day missing You
I won't ever again pretend that I can breathe without You
I can't breathe without you

(V2)
I was created for You, Beloved
A life purposed just to know You
I've fallen for You, Beloved
Death can't keep me from You
Your that all I desire
I crave all that You are
Its a desperate longing like desert for water
And I know now You're the answer to all my dreams

(Chorus)
I don't wanna waste one more moment away from You
I can't spend one more day missing You
I won't ever again pretend that I can breathe without You
I can't breathe without you

(Bridge)
Oh, I know that this is special
You've written me a beautiful love story

Wednesday, July 6, 2011



I love being a mama.